Do you want to keep dancing?

So, along with "The Soul of Prayer" and "Death of a Guru", tonight I picked up a book Sam had in my fall reading pile entitled: "Do you think I'm Beautiful?" And I thought, psshhhh Oh Paa-lease lady, who are you.. Angela Thomas?! Really this got published? because in all honesty I read "Captivating" and was totally unimpressed by the fluff and self gradification encrougaged in those pages, in my insignificant opinion that is. However, I got through the first chapter and actually liked it by the third page in chapter two.

Of course the beginging was something I could not relate to because it was a sob story, a pity party of words crowding over 20 pages about how this lady had never felt beautiful and accepted. Blah...we all have those days, I mean can we say PMS. And of course middle school is awkward and uncomfortable and embarresing. You're at the PEAK of insecurity, its just a bad situation overall! Annyway! This book was starting to really loose my interest until I decided to read onto Chapter two. The title:The Wallflower Who is Asked to Dance... how precious. Well then she told about a time in high school when the hott boy on the block actually asked her to dance, instead of her beautiful friends, who all had handsome dates with them, and she was always classified as...the wingman. The stunner came right over and pulled her to the dance floor, to her disbelief! THEN since, as always, the song ended way to quickly, she prepared herself to stand next to the wall for the remainder of the evening until...he implored "Do you want to keep dancing?"

AHHHHH! weeeeeee!!!! even though I was totally unsympathic at the start, now she definatly had me hooked. I was even squealing inside for this lady when she was a  16 year old! This strange woman writing about feeling sooo ugly, and now, now she asked the reader's of her book "Do you remember the first time you were asked to dance? Do you remember being noticed? Do you remember the crazy thing that happens to your stomach when a handsome man walks toward you? What is that? And why does it make us feel like we're floating? Are you smiling as you remember?" YES, duh, I was definatly smiling.. and it took me back.

First it took me back to the Home school fall family ball 2007 I think it was. I was 15. I had the most beautiful dress, it was by my late mom's favorite designer, Jessica McClintock. It was strapless, with black lace and a black bow accintuating my waist line which contrasted with the off-white A-line skirt. I felt like a princess - a DREAM! My friend Jamie grabbed me when I first walked into the gym and squealed for a good minuet straight at how old I looked. All that to say, there was a boy, oh and there always is a boy! Who, in the past few months had been pretty attentive through conventiant internet outlets, and on the ski slopes, and the frisbee feild. I just thought he was as cute as could be! It was perfect, I felt divinely skinny and beautiful...and that boy took notice! Back in those days though, a girl in the home school group was never allowed to be asked more than three times by the same fellah. If he wished to keep dancing with her, he had to ask the daunting father who usually congrated at the punch table. Well! My father never came to the dances and! the cutie asked me 5 times!! That was the first time I ever really felt singluarly noticed.

SIDE NOTE: However, much to my dismay, there is not a  happy ending like you're expecting from this sappy tale. He told me after the last dance that he was going to the high school football game to meet up with his....GIRL FRIEND. EXCUSE ME?! yea, eliza had to support my deflating frame as I wilted off my 4inch heels. From then on my feathers were ruffled and I subjected him to my wrath...and I write this with a grimace on my face...poor kid.

Second, I feel like commenting on the question about what happens to your stomach when a handsome man starts sauntering your way. I am terrible,absolutely awkward in this situation. For example, at a recent contra dance I attended, a very attractive guy made eye contact with me continiously through one dance, and afterwards was purposefully making his way over to me...and I knew it...and I froze, got the gitters, couldn't breath. THEN! I immediately turned my body away and pretended to be looking for someone on the other side of the gym, completely closing myself off from him. Ah! I have kicked myself inwardly for reacting like that, and making it a habit, because he was then intercepted by a bold young lady and I totally missed that opportunity for the rest of the night! Yes, I know that stomach feeling, why it is? I would really like to know, or well, at least have someone me strongly encourage to react differently. Naturally I flee from it haha! One day though, i know I will no doubt run to it.

For tonight, that is all.
Feel Beautiful, but more importantly "The Happiest People in the World are those who do the most for Others" - Booker T. Washington.